Oh My Heart

Friday

It's ironic that it's such a beautiful day outside, I don't have to put in overtime for the first time in 3 weeks, and all I can think about is getting out of the house so I can go sit in a Starbucks and look at my computer screen. Plus, Grandma was cooking something this morning that made the whole house stink. That's how things go.

I'm actually shopping in Second Life right now. My avatar needs new clothes. I never seem to have time to look for anything when I'm in SL, I usually just go to Sci. Fri. Island and listen to the discussion. But my goal for this weekend is to spiffy up my avatar and maybe go somewhere to hear live music, and meet some people. Shopping is fun here. Especially since I've been saving up my $L for months. And I don't have to try stuff on because no matter the size and shape of my avatar, the clothing will conform to me. Wouldn't that be cool in real life? Also, I just met a guy in the shop who only speaks Arabic. Random.

Saturday
Okay, I have to take back the bit about all the clothes fitting, and conforming to my avatar's size and shape. I tried some of the things on back in my Linden Home and the fit was not great. I figured out some of the items can be edited or resized. Options include length, higher/lower waist, tighter/looser fit and more. Though, once the garment has been adjusted as far as the designer specs allow, that's it. It still might not fit. I got a few items like this. I got this skirt that was adjustable but the bigger I made it to fit, the longer it got until it was too long. My feet barely stick out from the hem. Another problem with the skirt is that it doesn't allow sitting. In other words, it doesn't have flexibility built in. These are all things I never thought about before. I have to try to keep an eye out next time to find things which are editable, and flexible.

Since I haven't been able to figure these things out on my own, I got a book. "Second Life for Dummies." Hopefully it will have some hints to make it easier to get around and accomplish things. Otherwise I end up poring over the SL Wikis and maybe not even finding what I want. I think it's a language issue. There is some SL lingo that I haven't caught onto yet.

Anyway, I ended up going to Macy's to see if there was anything decent to get with the coupon that expires this weekend. I tried on everything in 3x straight off. It's official that most 2x don't really fit me anymore. At least in women's. I got the same sinking feeling of frustration I got when I was trying clothes on my avatar. I guess we really are alike. Even in the virtual world I get plenty of disappointment. I suppose it would be easy to correct. I could just make my avatar really hot and have her wear cool clothes. But that would feel like cheating and it's just not me. My aim has never been to escape. I'm just trying to find a connection. Same as in real life. But I want it to be with people who don't mind what I look like. Or at least, who don't judge me for it.

Speaking of connections, I've been thinking that it's nearly 10 years now since I first "met" everyone on the Semisonic message boards. Ten years is longer than I've known pretty much anyone I didn't go to high school with. It seems that most people just kind of wander into my life for a year or two, and then wander right back out. And some of the semi folks have been like that too. There are only a few I still hear from. Jules, Mandy, but most constant is Jazzie. She's really become a good friend. And occasionally Skip. But not really. I just sort of want him to still be there. Even if I don't hear from him, I don't want it confirmed that he's wandered off. I don't think my heart could take it.

In the meantime, Benrik have created an iPhone app called the Situationist. It basically lets you know if there is a fellow Benrikian nearby and if they are using the app it sends them a message that they should find you and perform one of the random acts you have sanctioned in the app. Things like "Hug me for 5 seconds exactly," or "Wave at me like a long lost friend." It seems there isn't much chance of me ever encountering one of these situations. One because there aren't any other Benrikians here in Vegas as far as I know. And Two, even if there were, they'd have to be nearby, and using the app. Highly unlikely. But it's made me wonder how things are going over in Benrikland. I haven't stopped in there in at least a year, maybe two. There are probably a load of new people. And who knows if any of those people I knew are active any longer. I have some of them as Facebook friends, so I occasionally see what they are up to. But that's about it.

Well, it's Saturday night now, and I'm not at all sure another search for signs of other SL residents would bear fruit. I may just skip it and go to bed. The clocks spring forward tonight already, so I've already lost an hour. And I've read none of the things I meant to read. I've got a nice little pile of comics from visits to Ralph's store. But maybe I can get through one if I start...right...now!