What's the Frequency, Kenneth?

Meanwhile on 30 Rock... This season Kenneth has been promoted to an executive in NBC's Standards and Practices Department. And then he misguidedly quits that job to come to Tracy's rescue and ends up only being able to find work as a janitor.  It's just like Kenneth to be so self-sacrificing that he puts himself at a disadvantage to help someone else. However, I suspect that the wardrobe department may have run out of crazy old suits to put Kenneth in.

Somehow, Kenneth manages to keep his chin up ("Medically, it's a neck ridge."), but he finally admits to Jack Donaghy that he does this by lying to himself and he doesn't know how much longer he can do it. I have a feeling that Kenneth will end up back as a Page soon. But in the meantime, he hasn't been used much in recent episodes. They usually find some way to get him involved a little bit each week, now that he doesn't work directly for TGS. But it's less than before which makes me sad.  In last week's live episode, it can be argued that Kenneth saved the show (Again!) by locking everyone in Tracy's dressing room and reminding them about all the great moments in live television. Okay, I'm the only one arguing that. But still. 

Kenneth still makes me laugh more than practically anyone. So my weekly happiness quotient is directly proportional to the frequency of his appearances on screen. He had an interesting turn in this week's episode. He ends up filling in at the last minute in Tracy's wife's fashion show, modeling what looked like a poncho, with his boxers showing. They put him in hilarious makeup, and then he had the sudden urge to try cocaine (heaven forbid). Hopefully he'll get more plot involvement soon. In the meantime, I have plenty of back episodes to watch over and over.

UPDATE: 5/20/12

This week was the season finale and it ended in a rather disturbing development for Kenneth.  Ms. Whassername is up to her usual manipulative tricks. And Kenneth just wants to see the good in everyone. Hopefully, he realizes before it's too late. He can't let her keep him from getting back into the Page program. That is where he belongs. And next season will be the last. They just announced it this week. Hopefully they get a whole season's worth of episodes. At least it looks like things might actually end well for Liz, which I assume is what we all want. I know I do. 

UPDATE to the UPDATE:

13 Episodes. That's all we're going to get for Season 7 :(

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Back to the Mets. After their 6-2 start, they came back down to earth a bit and are now hanging in there just above .500 at 15-13. That's good enough for 3rd in the division. So I still feel they are having a great season so far. There have been more injuries. Ruben Tejada got hurt today, tripping on his way to first base and Jason Bay has a cracked rib. But Andres Torres is doing well since he came back, and Kirk Nieuwenhuis has been quite the rookie sensation. David Wright and Daniel Murphy are still batting over .300, well over in David's case at .375! Daniel had four hits yesterday and drove in the first two runs today as R.A. Dickey cruised to his 4th win of the season. #LGM

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The turtles are doing well. I have finally named them. Sydney and Scout. Sydney is the shy one and Scout is the intrepid. I spent a good four hours cleaning their tank yesterday. Boy they made a mess. I put them in the little cardboard boxes I brought them home from the pet store in while I worked on their home. Sydney just sat perfectly still, head in shell the whole time. But Scout was literally climbing the walls. The box was just high enough that I figured there's no way he gets out of there. But later when I came back from washing the gravel in the bathtub, Scout was not in the box! I couldn't believe it. He didn't get far, he was just in the corner of the room by the closet. But I was amazed that he got out. You don't really think of turtles as being very agile, but they can be. Lesson learned!

Oh My Heart

Friday

It's ironic that it's such a beautiful day outside, I don't have to put in overtime for the first time in 3 weeks, and all I can think about is getting out of the house so I can go sit in a Starbucks and look at my computer screen. Plus, Grandma was cooking something this morning that made the whole house stink. That's how things go.

I'm actually shopping in Second Life right now. My avatar needs new clothes. I never seem to have time to look for anything when I'm in SL, I usually just go to Sci. Fri. Island and listen to the discussion. But my goal for this weekend is to spiffy up my avatar and maybe go somewhere to hear live music, and meet some people. Shopping is fun here. Especially since I've been saving up my $L for months. And I don't have to try stuff on because no matter the size and shape of my avatar, the clothing will conform to me. Wouldn't that be cool in real life? Also, I just met a guy in the shop who only speaks Arabic. Random.

Saturday
Okay, I have to take back the bit about all the clothes fitting, and conforming to my avatar's size and shape. I tried some of the things on back in my Linden Home and the fit was not great. I figured out some of the items can be edited or resized. Options include length, higher/lower waist, tighter/looser fit and more. Though, once the garment has been adjusted as far as the designer specs allow, that's it. It still might not fit. I got a few items like this. I got this skirt that was adjustable but the bigger I made it to fit, the longer it got until it was too long. My feet barely stick out from the hem. Another problem with the skirt is that it doesn't allow sitting. In other words, it doesn't have flexibility built in. These are all things I never thought about before. I have to try to keep an eye out next time to find things which are editable, and flexible.

Since I haven't been able to figure these things out on my own, I got a book. "Second Life for Dummies." Hopefully it will have some hints to make it easier to get around and accomplish things. Otherwise I end up poring over the SL Wikis and maybe not even finding what I want. I think it's a language issue. There is some SL lingo that I haven't caught onto yet.

Anyway, I ended up going to Macy's to see if there was anything decent to get with the coupon that expires this weekend. I tried on everything in 3x straight off. It's official that most 2x don't really fit me anymore. At least in women's. I got the same sinking feeling of frustration I got when I was trying clothes on my avatar. I guess we really are alike. Even in the virtual world I get plenty of disappointment. I suppose it would be easy to correct. I could just make my avatar really hot and have her wear cool clothes. But that would feel like cheating and it's just not me. My aim has never been to escape. I'm just trying to find a connection. Same as in real life. But I want it to be with people who don't mind what I look like. Or at least, who don't judge me for it.

Speaking of connections, I've been thinking that it's nearly 10 years now since I first "met" everyone on the Semisonic message boards. Ten years is longer than I've known pretty much anyone I didn't go to high school with. It seems that most people just kind of wander into my life for a year or two, and then wander right back out. And some of the semi folks have been like that too. There are only a few I still hear from. Jules, Mandy, but most constant is Jazzie. She's really become a good friend. And occasionally Skip. But not really. I just sort of want him to still be there. Even if I don't hear from him, I don't want it confirmed that he's wandered off. I don't think my heart could take it.

In the meantime, Benrik have created an iPhone app called the Situationist. It basically lets you know if there is a fellow Benrikian nearby and if they are using the app it sends them a message that they should find you and perform one of the random acts you have sanctioned in the app. Things like "Hug me for 5 seconds exactly," or "Wave at me like a long lost friend." It seems there isn't much chance of me ever encountering one of these situations. One because there aren't any other Benrikians here in Vegas as far as I know. And Two, even if there were, they'd have to be nearby, and using the app. Highly unlikely. But it's made me wonder how things are going over in Benrikland. I haven't stopped in there in at least a year, maybe two. There are probably a load of new people. And who knows if any of those people I knew are active any longer. I have some of them as Facebook friends, so I occasionally see what they are up to. But that's about it.

Well, it's Saturday night now, and I'm not at all sure another search for signs of other SL residents would bear fruit. I may just skip it and go to bed. The clocks spring forward tonight already, so I've already lost an hour. And I've read none of the things I meant to read. I've got a nice little pile of comics from visits to Ralph's store. But maybe I can get through one if I start...right...now!

The Sidewinder Sleeps Tonite

Wednesday was a long day at work, for more reasons than one. First we had a little brown bat visit our building. He was sleeping on the wall next to the outside stairwell. I went out and took a look at him. He was furry and cute and wasn't bothering anyone. The Site biologists came to check him out and said he'd be fine if we let him alone.

Then at the training building, they found this not-so-little guy. The solid waste people came to take him away. They say this sidewinder is just a sample of the bumper crop of snakes this summer. Hopefully, any other specimens I see will just be in pictures like this one.

Automatic for the People

So here's my automatic Olympic update! Moments ago the Olympic Hockey Gold went to Canada. Sydney Crosby scored the winning goal in overtime. A great Olympics comes to an end. Canada was a great host in Vancouver and they got the gold medals that were most important to them. But Team U.S.A had some great triumphs too. They won the most medals overall, setting a new record. Apolo got his 8th medal. The 4-man bobsledders rocked the sliding center to win gold. Both Lindsey Vonn and Bode Miller finally got their golds. The snowboarders owned many of their events again. Shani Davis repeated his gold in long track. And Chad Hedrick led the men's pursuit team to silver. Evan Lysacek took gold in men's figure skating just edging out the formidable Yevgeny Pleshenko. Our women skaters fell short, but it was South Korea's Kim Yu-Na's year. The amazing Joannie Rochette from Canada took the bronze just days after losing her mom suddenly. So many great moments in these games. It started off in tragedy with Nodar Kumaritashvili, the Georgian luger, dying after a major accident in practice just hours before the Opening Ceremony.

But now the Closing Ceremony is at hand. And time for life to go back to normal for most of the Olympians who will not have a stage this big for another four years.

For me, it's time to reboot and get back up to speed with work. But for now I, like Jemma seen above, will sit down and relax for a while.

Finest Worksong

Tomorrow I start a new job, so my latest stint on unemployment has finally come to an end. And I'm nervous and excited and relieved. The strange thing is I also feel a bit guilty. That sort of makes sense in these economic times. There are so many people out there still looking for work, and those many who are just now losing their jobs. And as long as it took to get to this point (I actually had to go into my extended unemployment benefits) I suffered relatively little. I had my family to fall back on. There wasn't much I had to give up. I was careful enough with money, but I could've been more careful. The biggest thing was having no place to go. Being stuck in the house, with no job to go to, while it gave me lots of time to do little projects I'd been putting off, it also allowed plenty of time for me feel depressed, unproductive, unsuccessful.

Then there was the fact that to most people not having a paying job meant I wasn't doing any work whatsoever. I made a great effort to keep structure in my days by doing job searches, applications and letters in the mornings before noon. Sometimes I was done quickly. I did have a lot of time, but I had no intention of shuttling my grandmother around or doing stuff no one else wanted to do just because I didn't have formal employment obligations. I allowed myself "work time" when I was unavailable to anyone else for the periods when I was doing my searches or another project, reading or writing. It didn't always work, but I kept to it as much as possible.

For all those months I tried to keep good humor while the people around me shared their sympathies and wished me better luck soon. And people were great. I mean, it's hardly unusual to be out of work in this recession. It isn't the mark of shame it used to be. But in the back of my mind, and those of my family members too I'm sure, there was this nagging feeling that it shouldn't be me in this situation. I'm highly educated, so I should have the accomplishments to go along with my promised potential. It was hard not to compare myself to people I grew up with, and went to school with, and see how far behind them I am in so many ways. Even my little brother, who had long had difficulty living up to expectations, went out and got a career for himself as a police officer. We're so proud of him, but for me, it's always been expected. So anything less is a disappointment.

And now it's time to hit the ground running again. I have a great opportunity, and a chance to make up for lost earnings and contribute more to the family and just get out of the house and feel better about myself. There's a part of me though that's afraid. I've been worried that my skills may have atrophied. What if I'm not as sharp and capable as I once was? Will I even be able to hack it? Getting up early, a long commute, a long and stressful work day. Am I still fit?

And now I won't have time to do anything else. All that time I had over the last 6 months, why didn't I do more? It was always difficult to plan when I never knew what the next week would bring. My resources were limited, and the time I had, it wasn't always my own. But it still seems like I did nothing! I know that's not the case, but the feeling is there. Where did all that time go?

So back to work tomorrow, hopefully for a longer and more stable period than before. But I can never let my guard down again. I can't be blindsided like I was when I lost my job at Upper Deck nearly a year ago. I can't let my life be defined by what I do either. I have to be more adaptable. And I have to make time for myself, no matter what I am doing for a living, so that I can live and not just survive.