Thursday nights as I go to sleep my mind is usually spinning with all the things I need and want to get done on the weekend. I'm also trying to process the information I need to accomplish these things. I know I have to go through my mail, and check all the usual sources for coupons and other discounts which are time sensitive. I feel like if I do anything, I have to do it in the most cost and time-efficient way possible.
Then Friday morning comes, and I haven't got as much sleep as I had hoped, and it's a bit hard to drag myself out of bed. Time flies and I've done nothing. The pressure I've already put on myself is weighing on me. So I try. I start to sift through all the information. And there is too much. It's overload.
Part of it is because I have so little time during the week. I have to put off thinking about things that I should be taking care of little by little. And then three days doesn't seem like enough to catch up. Especially when a whole day will go by when I get nothing done. Not because I didn't try, but because things just weren't going my way.
And then I get that lethargic feeling. I don't feel like scouring catalogs and websites. I don't feel like getting caught up on blogs or facebook. And I feel guilty for not wanting to. I know it all will go on without me. If I miss a sale, the world won't end. But I'm plied by the advertisers who are screaming at me daily. Last chance! Final hours! Get your discounts now! And the updates come in, they follow me. On my blackberry and iPod, on computers and in the mail. I know there will be more. There always are. Specials on free shipping? They have that every week. It would be silly to pay for shipping ever if you're smart. You can always get it free if you pay attention. Pay attention to all the information coming at you or you might miss something.
And is it all information I want? No, I'm subjected to stuff I don't want to know, no matter what I do. The gossip shows, the conversation of strangers. Even the news sometimes. And I can't turn it all off. I might miss something important.
But what is important. My family is important. I try to take care of things important to them. They don't ask much of me. Still I struggle. I can barely keep up on my own stuff. I can barely see though the fog of all the data coming at me. Then there's keeping up with friends, which I've been lousy at too. And then how can I rest, knowing of all that had to be left undone. So I do two, sometimes three things at once. Catch up on TV, surf the web, check the mail, play Farmville...yes, the distractions get in there too. And then none of it gets done well. Focus is what you have to give up. I do it at work too. But at home it seems especially fruitless. I feel like I can't write anymore. My mind just won't process everything the way it once did. So all I can do is hammer out a complaint here and a half finished thought there. And for now, that's going to have to be enough.
Then Friday morning comes, and I haven't got as much sleep as I had hoped, and it's a bit hard to drag myself out of bed. Time flies and I've done nothing. The pressure I've already put on myself is weighing on me. So I try. I start to sift through all the information. And there is too much. It's overload.
Part of it is because I have so little time during the week. I have to put off thinking about things that I should be taking care of little by little. And then three days doesn't seem like enough to catch up. Especially when a whole day will go by when I get nothing done. Not because I didn't try, but because things just weren't going my way.
And then I get that lethargic feeling. I don't feel like scouring catalogs and websites. I don't feel like getting caught up on blogs or facebook. And I feel guilty for not wanting to. I know it all will go on without me. If I miss a sale, the world won't end. But I'm plied by the advertisers who are screaming at me daily. Last chance! Final hours! Get your discounts now! And the updates come in, they follow me. On my blackberry and iPod, on computers and in the mail. I know there will be more. There always are. Specials on free shipping? They have that every week. It would be silly to pay for shipping ever if you're smart. You can always get it free if you pay attention. Pay attention to all the information coming at you or you might miss something.
And is it all information I want? No, I'm subjected to stuff I don't want to know, no matter what I do. The gossip shows, the conversation of strangers. Even the news sometimes. And I can't turn it all off. I might miss something important.
But what is important. My family is important. I try to take care of things important to them. They don't ask much of me. Still I struggle. I can barely keep up on my own stuff. I can barely see though the fog of all the data coming at me. Then there's keeping up with friends, which I've been lousy at too. And then how can I rest, knowing of all that had to be left undone. So I do two, sometimes three things at once. Catch up on TV, surf the web, check the mail, play Farmville...yes, the distractions get in there too. And then none of it gets done well. Focus is what you have to give up. I do it at work too. But at home it seems especially fruitless. I feel like I can't write anymore. My mind just won't process everything the way it once did. So all I can do is hammer out a complaint here and a half finished thought there. And for now, that's going to have to be enough.
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